Seven wise men with knowledge so fine, created a pussy to their design. First was a butcher, with smart wit, using a knife, he gave it a slit. Second was a carpenter, strong and bold, with a hammer and chisel, he gave it a hole. Third was a tailor, tall and thin, by using red [...]
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.) If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.. (Now that’s more like it [...]
On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby Red Indian reservation who was rumoured to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his certificate to the medicine [...]
Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve that connects the eyeball to the anus? It’s called the Anal Optic Nerve, and it is responsible for giving people a shitty outlook on life. If you don’t believe it, try to pull a hair from your arse and see if it doesn’t [...]
Sixth grade science teacher Mr. Sampson asks his class: “Who can tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?” Nobody raises a hand, so he calls on the first student to look his way. “Mary, can you tell me which organ of the human body expands [...]
Two women are walking home after a girlie night out. They are very drunk and the walk home is taking some time due to their intoxicated state. Eventually, they find themselves desperate for a pee. At that particular moment, they are passing a church and decide to go behind the headstones in the graveyard. As [...]
A hunter walked over to a tree and propped up his gun. Just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over, and discharged… shooting himself in the genitals. Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor. “Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. [...]
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he woke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she [...]
Lots of things go on during “spring break” as the college students let off a little steam. This one student was arrested for indecent exposure in a field near the beach, and was appearing before a judge. “I plead not guilty, Your Honor. I only went there to get relieved,” he testified. Well, I’m inclined [...]
I got this new deodorant today. The instructions said remove cap and push up bottom. I can barely walk, but whenever I fart the room smells awesome!