One morning, after her husband had gone to work, his wife decided to have a leisurely bath. She undressed and then remembered that the gas was still on in the kitchen. Wrapped in a towel, she went downstairs. She was about to turn off the gas when she heard footsteps. She realized at once that [...]
Proof that Men Have Better Friends… Friendship among Women: A woman didn’t come home one night. The next morning she told her husband she had slept over at a friend’s house. The man called his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. Friendship among Men: A man didn’t come home one [...]
Billy Bob and Luther were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob tells Luther; “Ya know, I reckon I’m ’bout ready for a vacation. Only this year I’m gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your advice about where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii . [...]
A guy is walking past a big wooden fence at the insane asylum and he hears all the residents inside chanting, “Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen!” Quite curious about this, he finds a hole in the fence, and looks in. Someone inside pokes him in the eye. Then everyone inside the asylum starts chanting, “Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!”
Little Johnny’s parents were screwing up a storm after which his Daddy headed to the bathroom to clean up. Daddy was halfway down the hallway when 6 year old Johnny also stepped into the hallway, and was shocked to see his old man standing there wearing nothing more than a condom. Johnny pointed at his [...]
The woman, a cute blonde as it happens, was pulled over for speeding by a California Highway Patrol motorcycle officer. When he walked up to her window and opened his ticket book she said: “I bet you’re going to sell me a ticket to the Highway Patrolman’s Ball.” He replied: “No, Highway Patrolmen don’t have [...]
Little Jenny comes home from playing at Johnny’s house. “Hey Mom, guess what! Johnny’s got a penis like a peanut!” Mom is understandably confused for a second, then asks, “What, you mean it’s shaped like a peanut?” “No silly, it’s salty!”
A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, ‘Harry, what’s your problem?’ Harry answered, ‘I’m too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I’m smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!’ Ms. Brooks had [...]
A farmer stood leaning on a fence at the edge of his property. He watched as a red sports car came over the top of a hill and followed the road up to the spot where he stood. The driver pulled over to the side of the road and called out to the farmer. “Do [...]
The Right Way to Spell Potato If GH can stand for P as in Hiccough If OUGH stands for O as in Dough If PHTH stands for T as in Phthisis If EIGH stands for A as in Neighbour If TTE stands for T as in Gazette If EAU stands for O as in Plateau [...]