An Arab had spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It got so bad that his camel died of thirst. He crawled through the sands, certain that he was breathing his last breath, when suddenly, he saw a shiny object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him. [...]
Paddy is doing some roofing for Murphy. He nears the top of the ladder and starts shaking and going dizzy. He calls down to Murphy and says,” I tink I will ave to go home I’ve gone all giddy and I feel sick.” Murphy: ” Ave yer got vertigo Paddy” Paddy: ” No I only [...]
An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick’s Catholic Church. ‘Father’, he confessed, ‘it has been one month since my last confession. I had sex with Fanny Green twice last month.’ The priest told the sinner, ‘You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary’s.’ Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional. [...]
Hans, a middle-aged German tourist on his first visit to Orlando, Florida, finds the red light district and enters a large brothel. The madam asks him to be seated and sends over a young lady to entertain him. They sit and talk, frolic a little, giggle a bit, drink a bit, and she sits on [...]
A man walks into the sheriff’s office … “I want to become a deputy!” “Good, I want you to catch this man” says the sheriff handling the man a wanted poster. The poster reads : ‘Last seen wearing a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper pants, and brown paper boots.’ “What’s he wanted [...]
An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made [...]
1. Money cannot buy happiness but somehow, it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes Benz than it is on a bicycle. 2. Forgive your enemy but remember the bastard’s name. 3. Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again. 4. Many people are [...]
Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabbouleh and a pint of goat’s milk. The older of the two pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. They start reminiscing. ”This is my oldest son, Mujibar. He would have been 24 years old now.” [...]
An ignorant but well-meaning tourist was visiting a small Polynesian island when he came across a native man proudly displaying twenty alligator teeth slung about his neck in a decorative fashion. “I guess you must prize alligator teeth the way we value pearls,” said the tourist. “More so,” said the native. “Anyone can open up [...]
The largest condom factory in the States burned down. President Obama was awakened at 4 am by the telephone. “Sorry to bother you at this hour, Sir, but there is an emergency! I’ve just received word that the Durex factory in Washington has burned to the ground. It is estimated that the entire USA supply [...]