Mrs. Donovan was walking down O’Connell Street in Dublin when she met up with Father Flaherty. The Father said, ‘Top o’ the mornin’ to ye! Aren’t ye Mrs. Donovan and didn’t I marry ye and yer hoosband two years ago?’ She replied, ‘Aye, that ye did, Father.’ The Father asked, ‘And be there any wee [...]
While in China , an American man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom the entire time he is there. A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots. Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. [...]
My boss thrust a picture under my nose, “What the f*ck is this!” he asked. “Well,” I calmly replied, “It appears to be a photo of me f*cking your wife. You know that’s not real don’t you? It’s clearly been Photoshopped.” “What?” he said, relaxing slightly, “How can you tell?” “Well, your wife’s tits aren’t [...]
My wife came up to me with a dreamy look in her eye and asked, “Why don’t we make love like they do in the movies?” So I grabbed her, laid her on the kitchen table, performed oral sex on her, screwed her, stuck it in her mouth, turned her over, spanked her, stuck it [...]
His dad is driving 8 year old Little Johnny home from school. While they are stopped at a traffic light, the son notices 2 dogs screwing on the lawn next to the car. “What are they doing?” asks Johnny. “Uuuhhhh…..they…..are…..uh……..making a puppy” says Dad. Johnny says, “OK,” and Dad is relieved he didn’t have to [...]
One day, an African chief’s wife gave birth to a white child and the chief was absolutely stunned. He suspected some hanky panky and went to the white Jesuit missionary father and looked at him suspiciously. “You have been having sex with my wives,” he accused the white father, who looked very uncomfortable. The Jesuit, [...]
As I rolled over and pulled the covers over me, my secretary asked, “What’s wrong? It’s not usually over that quickly. It must’ve been less than thirty seconds. At work earlier, on the desk, you were banging away for nearly an hour.” “I’ve got a picture of my wife on the desk at work,” I [...]
Hans, a middle-aged German tourist on his first visit to Orlando, Florida, finds the red light district and enters a large brothel. The madam asks him to be seated and sends over a young lady to entertain him. They sit and talk, frolic a little, giggle a bit, drink a bit, and she sits on [...]
A doctor had just finished a marathon shagging session with one of his patients. He was resting afterwards and was feeling a bit guilty because he thought it wasn’t really ethical to screw his patients. However, a little voice in his head said, “Lots of other doctors have sex with their patients, so its not [...]
Little Johnny’s teacher sent a note home to his Mother saying, “Johnny seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about sex and girls.” The Mother wrote back the next day, “If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father.” ———— Little [...]